When someone we care about is struggling, it is natural to want to help. Offering advice feels like a way to show we care, but phrases like 'go for a walk' or 'just think positive' can sometimes have the opposite effect. What is meant as encouragement may leave someone feeling dismissed or misunderstood. Being thoughtful about how we respond can make support more meaningful.

1. Just Think Positive

   Positive thinking can be beneficial, but it can also invalidate real feelings and struggles. It is not always possible to switch emotions on or off.
   Instead: Acknowledge what someone is feeling and offer support without pressure.

2. It Could Be Worse

   Perspective matters, but this phrase often shuts down conversation. Comparing struggles can make someone feel as though their problems do not deserve help.
   Instead: Validate their experience and listen.

3. You Just Need to Get Out More

   Social connection can support mental health, but for some, socialising causes anxiety or overwhelm. Pushing too hard can cause someone to withdraw further.
   Instead: Let them choose what connection feels safe and comfortable.

4. You Are Stronger Than This

   Encouragement is helpful, but this can feel like a demand to power through. Strength is not about never struggling; it is about finding ways to cope and seek help.
   Instead: Remind them it is okay not to be okay.

5. Go For a Walk

   Walking can lift mood and support wellbeing, but it is not always possible when someone is finding things difficult. Suggesting it as a quick solution can leave them feeling guilty if they cannot do it.
   Instead: Ask what feels manageable for them today and move at their pace.

Remember, support is not about fixing everything. More often it is about being present, listening and showing patience. A kind ear can mean more than any quick piece of advice.

If you or someone you know is finding it hard to cope, our crisis services are here to help. You do not have to go through it alone. Find support on our Crisis support page.